News headlines in today’s world resemble a game show in which the contestant is given a series of  headlines and the object is to guess which one is fake news.  And, even if you take politics out of the equation, it is becoming harder and harder to tell which is which.

We have for as long as I can remember been subjected to what we call “tabloid journalism,” with stories of Elvis being alive and living on another planet, and female celebrities having alien babies, but let’s just take a look at some of the headlines in recent days to see how they compare to that kind of ridiculous reporting.

Frighteningly, everything you are about to read is true and was published on a web page of a reputable news service, assuming there is such a thing anymore.

Let’s begin with President Trump’s tweet to North Korea’s Kim Jong Un over which one had the biggest nuclear button on his desk.  Not only were the remarks from both sides childish and immature, the consequences could lead to millions of people across the world being killed in a nuclear missile strike to prove who could do the most damage.  Hard to believe anyone who has risen to a leadership position in any country being more irresponsible, but there you have it.

Just to amplify the point, here comes the headline from Newsweek that one of the participants in the “mine is the biggest” contest had one of its missiles accidentally land on one of its own cities.  Great, not only are they dangerously irresponsible, they are incompetent as well.  That certainly makes for a combination everyone between North Korea and the US should be concerned over.

From USA Today, we have a report from Florida that iguanas are becoming partially frozen due to the unseasonably cold temperatures and falling from the trees.  It’s raining iguanas in Florida.  Officials are advising residents to leave the stiffened reptiles alone, because they may not be dead and could bite if aroused.  As if one needed to be told.

In a society that apparently has lost all concerns over privacy comes the headline from CNET that Kohler, a manufacturer of toilet, shower and tub fixtures, wants to install Amazon’s Alexa in your bathrooms.  According to the article, the devices will work with other voice assistant applications as well and you can do things like control the temperature of your shower, fill your tub to a certain level, and most impressively, “You can even use your voice to flush the high-end Numi toilet.”  Imagine the faces of the starving populations in Africa when they hear about this!

In probably the winner of the “Most Like Supermarket Tabloid” category, we have the headline that a video about a penis-whitening laser procedure has gone viral, with more than 4 million views as of Thursday.  A hospital in Bangkok began to offer the procedure a few months back after one of its clients complained about dark pigmentation on his member, according to the article on Newsweek.com.  The hospital is getting about 100 patients a month, at a cost of about $650 for the five sessions required to complete the process.

Ladies need not be feeling left out, as the clinic also has a “3-D Vagina” offering that leads to a “more pronounced, plumper look.”

Then there is a story about a man smearing feces “everywhere” on an airline flight, sex robots making men obsolete, and a new study that says acting silly will lead to a longer, happy life.

Even the real news seems unbelievable.  No wonder there is so much fake news out there.  Or is it fake at all?