“A happy wife is a happy life” – many a husband has heard the age-old advice from guiding fathers and protective mother-in-laws. Is it true, or is it a tongue in cheek nod to our societal understanding of gender roles within relationships? According to researchers from Rutgers and the University of Michigan, the old adage doesn’t just hold up – it’s true in the literal sense. For married men, how highly their wives rate the marriage affects his overall happiness, regardless of his satisfaction with the marriage itself.

“I think it comes down to the fact that when a wife is satisfied with the marriage she tends to do a lot more for her husband, which has a positive effect on his life,” said Deborah Carr, a professor in the Department of Sociology, School of Arts and Science at Rutgers University. “Men tend to be less vocal about their relationships and their level of marital unhappiness might not be translated to their wives.”

The study was unique in that it focused on older adults – in each of the 394 participating couples, at least one spouse was aged 60 or older. The average marriage duration was 39 years. Participants were surveyed on several topics, including whether their spouse appreciates them, argues with them, understands their feelings or gets on their nerves. They also kept journals for the previous 24 hours noting how happy they were during shared activities like shopping, chores and watching TV.

The study found that when the wives rated their satisfaction with the marriage highly, the men tended to report being happier overall. Overall the participants in the study were a happy lot, with most of them rating their overall life happiness a five out of six. Men tended to report greater satisfaction with the marriage than the wives did.

More than just anecdotal, the study may have significant health implications:

“The quality of a marriage is important because it provides a buffer against the health-depleting effects of later life stressors and helps couples manage difficult decisions regarding health and medical decision making,” Carr said.