When it comes to apps, Katy Perry says “yes” to Dictionary and “no” to Tinder. The singer covers Harper’s Bazaar’s October issue and amidst talk of the pop music empire she created and controls the interview inevitably turns to her personal life. Formally single since her 2012 divorce from Russell Brand, she reveals that at 29, she feels more “open” than ever before.

Part of this, Perry admits, comes from maturity. “What I’ve learned is that if you don’t have a foundation of self-love first, you really have nowhere to pull love from to give it away. I had to learn about taking care of myself before I could take care of others.” She lists her “must-haves” as “a sense of humor…someone who is sensitive, someone who loves and understands music, and who is really smart.” She reveals that she herself uses a Dictionary app and is attracted to “gentlemen with large vocabularies.”

Perry also confesses it is difficult to find someone who isn’t overwhelmed by the magnitude of her incredibly successful career. “They say they’re not [intimidated by me] but it comes out in the long run,” she muses. “They’re threatened, or there’s resentment.”

Despite all the challenges, she actively dates, and takes issue with recent reports that she was willing to have a baby without a male partner. “I didn’t say that. I just said, I’m good,” she explains. Though she has to ask, “Why am I a baby machine? Why can’t I be a mogul?”